I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
Randomize
