That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
He was having this drunk emotional breakdown and I was just trying to cheer him up but instead fell and dumped the whole pickle jar on me
It was cool though because he was fine afterwards and somehow I convinced them I did it on purpose...
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
Randomize
