I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Randomize
