I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
Randomize
