Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
She just used a chaser for red wine.
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
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