I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
I love how my phone automatically capitalizes Margarita. R-e-s-p-e-c-t.
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
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