Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(614): View more from Ohio

youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?

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(614): youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right? http://tfl.nu/3ekq

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(703): View more from Virginia

There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....

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(703): There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it.... http://tfl.nu/mny7

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(817): View more from Texas

Dude. Creed is coming in september.

(1-817): View more from Texas

We're no longer friends.

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(817): Dude. Creed is coming in september. (1-817): We're no longer friends. http://tfl.nu/0z8r

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(954): View more from Florida

I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa

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(954): I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa http://tfl.nu/4mlw

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(213): View more from California

I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.

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(213): I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on. http://tfl.nu/rma0

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(978): View more from Massachusetts

I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.

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(978): I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now. http://tfl.nu/xddc

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(716): View more from New York

you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do

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(716): you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do http://tfl.nu/chus

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(973): View more from New Jersey

I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you

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(973): I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you http://tfl.nu/07bs

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(204): View more from Manitoba

Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus

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(204): Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus http://tfl.nu/ux11

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(847): View more from Illinois

Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"

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(847): Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!" http://tfl.nu/mldx

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(262): View more from Wisconsin

Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon

(1-262): View more from Wisconsin

That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months

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(262): Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon (1-262): That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months http://tfl.nu/99ql

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(206): View more from Washington

Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.

(1-206): View more from Washington

Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.

(206): View more from Washington

Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.

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(206): Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack. (1-206): Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on. (206): Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together. http://tfl.nu/xcw6

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(912): View more from Georgia

Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?

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(912): Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever? http://tfl.nu/koc4

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(617): View more from Massachusetts

We don't really communicate like that.

(781): View more from Massachusetts

Communicate like what?

(617): View more from Massachusetts

Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.

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(617): We don't really communicate like that. (781): Communicate like what? (617): Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants. http://tfl.nu/kuit

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(727): View more from Florida

There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..

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(727): There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you.. http://tfl.nu/y77w

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