bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
These 25 Drunks Should’ve Gotten Cut Off A Long Time Ago
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
27 Freshmen Who Really Didn’t Know What They Were Getting In To
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.