I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
plans for tonight: dress up like pirates, drink a bottle of mad dog and watch the sorostitues across the street get naked. and yes, the mad dog part is already in play. hurry the fuck up. i look like a loser doing this alone.
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
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