Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
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