she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
Randomize
