No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
