Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
I love how my cats smell like pot.
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
