mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
i would punch a child for taco bell
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
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I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
jump out the window naked night went bad
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
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