She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Randomize
