I queefed so loud it echoed.
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
Thank god for federal credentials. Waaaaayyyy to hungover to go through airport security lines right now.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
Randomize
