why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
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