I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
and then I told her I was too drunk. She started to cry, and told me this always happens to her and that she thinks shes ugly. I pretended I was asleep and then she farted.
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
You'll have to pretend I'm texting you with buddychecks.
Like the Jimeny Cricket of cockblocks.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
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