Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
Wingman of the year award. I made out with her gay roommate in order for you to get laid. Better have been good.
The gay roommate was probably better than her. Consider yourself lucky.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
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