She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
Randomize
