he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
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