So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
hi, I love you... and I'm sorry your floor is covered in popcorn, your cabinet is broken, all your alcohol is gone, you're 80 dollars poorer, everything in your bedside table is soaked in beer, austin slept in your bed in those disgusting underwear, I made out with your toilet seat, and for talking to your mom with a four loko in my hand
Randomize
