i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
Randomize
