my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
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