New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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