Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
no more duck duck goose at the bar
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
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