Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
25 People Confess The Most Ignorant Thing Someone Has Ever Said To Them
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
27 Signs That Someone Will Probably Be Bad At Sex
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.