I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
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i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
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We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.