She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
Randomize
