Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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