i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
Chasing my kid around a 30' jungle gym was not how I envisioned spending the day off work to recover from a vasectomy.
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
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