I'm lost and stupid without you.
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
Randomize
