oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
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