He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Randomize
