im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
You were trust falling into bushes
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Randomize
