Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
Going to the hospital for stitches on my balls. Mom walked in on me manscaping with an electric razor. Tell NOBODY.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
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