I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
The Russian stripper asked if I like foreign girls. I told her I absolutely fucking hate accents. Most awkward 7 minutes ever
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
YAS. BRING CRAB.
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize