Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
Honestly I miss having a gay roommate. His female friends' implicit trust in him would carry over to me even though they knew Im straight. Best unintentional wingman ever.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
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