yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
Randomize