If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
Randomize
