I changed my tire completely alone.. I could totally win survivor
Its my greatest physical accomplishment
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
Just saw a homeless guy with a sign that said "Family abducted by aliens. Need money for ransom" and on the back of the sign it said "And it's only $.88"
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
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