So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
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