Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize
