Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
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