Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
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