youre lurking in front of me
Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
If I don't wake up snuggled up to 14 ice cream sandwiches, my life is incomplete.
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
He booked his flight from Dallas already, no ticket to the game, said hes gonna bang some girl at tailgait to get a ticket, I had to explain that it will be sub 20 degrees F during tailgate, he decided to come in july instead, Texans are dumb.
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
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