Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
Randomize
