Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
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Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
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My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.