I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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