there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
You ate ashes out of my bong
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
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