kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
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