didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
I'm sorry my penis didn't work
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
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