Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
Randomize
