the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
